A first love

This is a story about the first year of my relationship with the girl I love. I suppose it starts back in July 2017. She was dating my best friend at the time, they were in a relationship for a few weeks and it ended on bad terms. ______ they were dating I had only seen her one time, I didn’t really say much to her as I am a very shy and socially awkward person.

I think I managed to get a few hellos out but nothing more than that. _____ I met her on the 31st of October. To be honest I don't really remember that night much since I was black out drunk for the majority of it. By that time things seemed to be ok between her and my friend and that's how I started talking to her more.

In late November we were all talking in group chats. Online I am a lot less awkward and am able to talk to other people, ____ this was a great way for me to start talking to her. As I started to become more friendly with her I started to realize that she's not how my best friend made her out to be at all.

We started to hang out more, and the more time I spent with her the closer I felt to her. I couldn't quite explain why ____ I felt like I had some sort of bond with her like I could connect with her in a way that I couldn't with the other people. Usually, I hate it when people hug me, but when she did it always felt warm and comforting.

Our relationship progressed was on new Year's eve. I had one of my depressive episodes and ended up leaving all of the group chats I was in. At the time I just felt really lonely, as if I'm destined to never be happy. She ended up private messaging me, asking what was wrong and why I was feeling like that. ____ I talked to her and she seemed to have the perfect response to everything. After a while, I felt a little better about myself and I will never forget some of the things that she said to me that night. January..

We hung out once a week, usually in a group of 7 people. At this point, I ________ her a very close friend of mine, and without wanting to sound like a white knight SJW. I _____ like I wanted to look out for her as much as possible. In that group were a few guys, really creepy. And how they treated her made me feel upset and angry, I wasn't too sure why I felt so strongly towards her. I was convinced that I can't like her due to her being my best friend's ex.